WEBVTT 1 00:00:03.920 --> 00:00:08.880 From Futuro Media. It's Latino USA. I'm Maria Inojosa and 2 00:00:09.080 --> 00:00:19.960 today Anything for Selena, dear listener, Today we have something 3 00:00:20.079 --> 00:00:23.400 super super special for you. It's an episode from our 4 00:00:23.520 --> 00:00:28.280 newest podcast, Anything for Selena, and this is a collaboration 5 00:00:28.400 --> 00:00:33.320 between Futuro Studios and wbu R in Boston. The podcast 6 00:00:33.479 --> 00:00:37.360 is a deep dive into Selena Quintania's lasting impact on 7 00:00:37.440 --> 00:00:43.480 Latino identity and American belonging, hosted by journalist Maria Garcia. 8 00:00:43.800 --> 00:00:47.360 And I'm gonna hand things over to Maria right now. 9 00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:54.880 If I was somehow asked to say only one thing 10 00:00:55.320 --> 00:00:58.640 about the place I'm from, it would be that it 11 00:00:58.680 --> 00:01:05.080 has this un forgettable smell. When it rains. It's slightly floral, 12 00:01:05.600 --> 00:01:11.080 but mostly it's this very specific, cool, earthy desert aroma. 13 00:01:11.959 --> 00:01:16.119 And there's usually a calm, clear breeze which carries these 14 00:01:16.360 --> 00:01:19.240 concentrated little pockets of fragrance. 15 00:01:21.319 --> 00:01:22.360 Oh my god, there it is. 16 00:01:23.120 --> 00:01:26.959 The smell comes from the creosote bush, a resilient plant 17 00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:32.760 that thrives only in this particularly arid landscape. Especially after 18 00:01:32.840 --> 00:01:36.840 a thunderstorm, the creosoap bush releases a bunch of these 19 00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:42.720 oil compounds into the air, stuff found in citrus rosemary pines, 20 00:01:43.640 --> 00:01:51.360 and it just smells like the earth. Exhales Creosot can 21 00:01:51.400 --> 00:01:55.200 live for thousands or tens of thousands of years. It's 22 00:01:55.240 --> 00:01:59.080 one of the oldest living things on the planet. And 23 00:01:59.160 --> 00:02:03.160 here this ancient brush grows at the foot of the 24 00:02:03.160 --> 00:02:07.840 Franklin Mountains and the valley they nessl below. Cutting through 25 00:02:07.880 --> 00:02:12.359 the desert valley is the Rio Grande, dividing two cities 26 00:02:12.680 --> 00:02:17.760 and two countries, al Paso, Texas to the north and 27 00:02:17.800 --> 00:02:30.280 Sudethwattas in Mexico to the south. This story, my story, 28 00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:33.960 long before I became a journalist and moved to the 29 00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:36.000 East coast, begins here. 30 00:02:36.240 --> 00:02:40.520 Well, I remember seeing Opasso from the hill where Mamonina lived. 31 00:02:40.840 --> 00:02:44.960 This is my brother Jesse. Well, actually his name is Jesusilias, 32 00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:47.960 but it goes by Jesse. He was five when I 33 00:02:48.040 --> 00:02:51.639 was born in Suethwattas, just a few miles from the border. 34 00:02:52.400 --> 00:02:55.800 One of his very first memories is looking across the 35 00:02:55.800 --> 00:02:56.959 border to the US. 36 00:02:57.360 --> 00:03:01.080 We could see Utube, we could see the building's a highway. 37 00:03:01.800 --> 00:03:05.880 We could see the other side. 38 00:03:05.919 --> 00:03:09.480 My parents could see the other side too. In Mexico, 39 00:03:09.680 --> 00:03:13.519 we lived in a Vessigna. These tenements studio apartments, all 40 00:03:13.560 --> 00:03:17.840 connected through the same courtyard. Something like ten families shared 41 00:03:18.040 --> 00:03:22.960 one bathroom outside. My dad, like a lot of folks, 42 00:03:23.400 --> 00:03:26.720 already crossed the border practically every day to odd jobs 43 00:03:26.760 --> 00:03:29.880 in El Paso, like at an egg factory. He and 44 00:03:29.919 --> 00:03:31.840 my mom had to quit school by the age of 45 00:03:31.880 --> 00:03:35.240 thirteen to help their families. The other side of the 46 00:03:35.280 --> 00:03:39.040 border looked safer, quieter, the kind of place that could 47 00:03:39.040 --> 00:03:41.880 afford my brother and I the life our parents couldn't have. 48 00:03:43.040 --> 00:03:45.640 When I was three, my parents took all the money 49 00:03:45.680 --> 00:03:49.000 they saved and moved us across the border to a small, 50 00:03:49.240 --> 00:03:53.400 refurbished trailer in the most rural, undeveloped outskirts of El 51 00:03:53.400 --> 00:03:58.600 Paso County. The land was dry and flat, untouched. 52 00:03:58.360 --> 00:04:01.320 And I remember getting off the car seeing those huge 53 00:04:01.440 --> 00:04:05.880 tumbleweeds and under there usually there's snake pits. You know, 54 00:04:05.920 --> 00:04:08.240 there's snakes, And when we first moved out here, there 55 00:04:08.280 --> 00:04:10.360 was always you know, there was always snakes coming out. 56 00:04:11.320 --> 00:04:15.440 One of my earliest memories ever is the smell of 57 00:04:15.560 --> 00:04:16.840 creosot bush here. 58 00:04:18.120 --> 00:04:21.200 We were ecstatic as a family, you know, we loved 59 00:04:21.240 --> 00:04:23.240 the trailer nocentemosnaos. 60 00:04:23.279 --> 00:04:31.200 Basically, we still went to Wattis every weekend. There was 61 00:04:31.240 --> 00:04:34.600 always a cousin's birthday party, or a baby shower or 62 00:04:34.640 --> 00:04:40.720 an anniversary. In Mexico, we made home videos at these 63 00:04:40.760 --> 00:04:44.680 big family parties, a bunch of kids speaking Spanglish and 64 00:04:44.720 --> 00:04:49.000 staying up way late. I remember what is always being loud, 65 00:04:49.360 --> 00:04:54.080 like fun loud. We danced into the early morning hours 66 00:04:54.160 --> 00:04:57.760 at either of my grandmother's houses. A root of cousins 67 00:04:57.839 --> 00:05:01.120 eating street tacos, glistening in the dark amber of the 68 00:05:01.160 --> 00:05:11.200 Mexican street lamps. This was my early life, Mexico on 69 00:05:11.240 --> 00:05:15.400 the weekend, the States during the week. Soon I started school. 70 00:05:16.240 --> 00:05:19.400 On the first day of first grade, my teacher called 71 00:05:19.440 --> 00:05:23.920 me Mary. My actual name is Maria Elena, a name 72 00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:27.160 passed down for my grandmother. My mom says no one 73 00:05:27.200 --> 00:05:30.680 ever asked her if changing my name from Maria Elena 74 00:05:30.920 --> 00:05:33.839 to Mary it was okay. She just kind of found 75 00:05:33.839 --> 00:05:37.440 out in an open house Bussie with we a lopink 76 00:05:37.520 --> 00:05:41.360 house when my teacher started talking about Mary may La 77 00:05:41.360 --> 00:05:45.840 Maestro this Lama made Mary and she was like, who's 78 00:05:45.960 --> 00:05:52.640 that were? Mary? Mary? Oh, it didn't really even occur 79 00:05:52.720 --> 00:05:55.760 to my mom. To object. We were new, she didn't 80 00:05:55.760 --> 00:05:59.839 speak English, we were undocumented, so she was like, Okay, 81 00:06:00.040 --> 00:06:08.640 I guess they'll call her Mary. My name, something I 82 00:06:08.720 --> 00:06:12.520 didn't really think about much before, soon became a source 83 00:06:12.560 --> 00:06:17.440 of ridicule. Whenever a substitute teacher said my real name Maria, 84 00:06:17.839 --> 00:06:21.400 kids laughed. Some of them would even say ew a 85 00:06:21.560 --> 00:06:26.200 Mexican name. I remember what it felt like as shame 86 00:06:26.320 --> 00:06:35.200 took form inside of me. In the third grade, a 87 00:06:35.240 --> 00:06:38.240 classmate found some paperwork in the school office that said 88 00:06:38.279 --> 00:06:41.880 I was born in Watts. He confronted me like I 89 00:06:41.960 --> 00:06:45.640 was hoarding a shameful secret. He told me he'd found 90 00:06:45.640 --> 00:06:49.200 me out who I really was, that I was from Watts. 91 00:06:50.279 --> 00:06:53.080 I panicked. I said, there must have been a mistake. 92 00:06:55.080 --> 00:06:57.960 The kid who confronted me he was white, the son 93 00:06:58.000 --> 00:07:02.800 of a wealthy farmer who employed seasonal Mexican workers. Kids 94 00:07:02.839 --> 00:07:05.880 like him were at the top of the elementary school hierarchy, 95 00:07:06.640 --> 00:07:11.800 favored by teachers, popular often cruel, at the bottom, where 96 00:07:11.840 --> 00:07:14.760 the kids of the Mexican farm workers employed by this 97 00:07:14.840 --> 00:07:19.000 boy's dad. My school was predominantly Latino, but there was 98 00:07:19.040 --> 00:07:22.440 a pecking order that rewarded kids who were the most 99 00:07:22.520 --> 00:07:27.880 assimilated these moments of shame, of lying. They feel like 100 00:07:28.040 --> 00:07:34.440 some of the oldest wounds in me. But I thought 101 00:07:34.480 --> 00:07:37.920 I needed to be Mary. Mary wasn't born in Mexico. 102 00:07:38.200 --> 00:07:41.480 She didn't listen to Spanish music. She listened to TLC 103 00:07:41.760 --> 00:07:46.280 and Brandy and Boys to Men. She spoke English perfectly. 104 00:07:47.040 --> 00:07:51.600 She was American. And here's the thing. I became Mary, 105 00:07:52.360 --> 00:07:56.520 or at least partially did. I became more articulate in 106 00:07:56.560 --> 00:08:01.640 English because of school. I started fumbling my Spanish. Kids 107 00:08:01.640 --> 00:08:05.720 in Mexico called me a bocha, a Mexican American who 108 00:08:05.760 --> 00:08:11.480 debased the Spanish language with their crass, working class Spanglish. 109 00:08:11.760 --> 00:08:15.080 So I was increasingly feeling out of place in Mexico 110 00:08:15.160 --> 00:08:21.840 two in subtle but painful ways, and I felt a rejection, 111 00:08:22.600 --> 00:08:26.880 a stigma in both countries. I was always toggling between 112 00:08:26.960 --> 00:08:32.880 these two places, Mary and Maria Spanish at home English 113 00:08:32.920 --> 00:08:38.320 in the world. These two realities never came together. That 114 00:08:38.480 --> 00:08:43.160 was just life. I grew up believing that dividing yourself 115 00:08:43.200 --> 00:08:47.880 into was completely normal, that I had to switch depending 116 00:08:47.880 --> 00:08:51.360 on what side of the border I was in to 117 00:08:51.520 --> 00:08:56.280 seven eight year old me, My entire life up until 118 00:08:56.280 --> 00:09:00.800 that point had been defined by the border, and this 119 00:09:00.960 --> 00:09:05.920 line of separation between Mexico and the US, between Mary 120 00:09:06.240 --> 00:09:11.600 and Maria. It wasn't just on a map. It felt 121 00:09:11.920 --> 00:09:24.120 like the border divided me from the inside to And 122 00:09:24.160 --> 00:09:29.360 then something changed my life. I saw a completely new 123 00:09:29.440 --> 00:09:46.120 way of being. I discovered Selena Republica Mexicana, Theresa Corcos 124 00:09:46.160 --> 00:10:00.600 Christie Slena. I know I had heard her music before 125 00:10:00.640 --> 00:10:04.679 and been vaguely aware of her, but I specifically remember 126 00:10:04.760 --> 00:10:09.040 the first time I really saw Selena on TV. I 127 00:10:09.080 --> 00:10:12.520 must have been about seven. She had this cascade of 128 00:10:12.640 --> 00:10:56.520 black hair, red lips, brown skin. She sang like she 129 00:10:56.559 --> 00:10:59.839 felt every single word of her songs, like the music 130 00:11:00.280 --> 00:11:05.920 emanating from her body. People just loved her. I loved her. 131 00:11:18.840 --> 00:11:21.800 She usually wore these skin tight pants or a mini 132 00:11:21.840 --> 00:11:26.640 skirt with an embellish bra or boostier, sometimes peeking out 133 00:11:26.679 --> 00:11:30.040 from a leather jacket or sea through blouse. There were 134 00:11:30.080 --> 00:11:32.840 a lot of rhinestones and hoop ear rings. 135 00:11:33.320 --> 00:11:36.680 Thretfley Selena, you got it, take it away, Yes. 136 00:11:37.480 --> 00:11:41.920 And her dance moves. She do these elaborate twirls and 137 00:11:41.960 --> 00:11:46.560 sway her hips so rhythmically. She shimmied her shoulders like 138 00:11:46.640 --> 00:11:50.559 my cousins in Mexico. Other times she'd like bust out 139 00:11:50.600 --> 00:11:53.400 the Roger Rabbit or even the Moonwalk. 140 00:11:56.160 --> 00:11:59.000 Know that just at that. 141 00:12:04.320 --> 00:12:07.600 She sang bouncy Mexican cumbias like the ones I Danced 142 00:12:07.640 --> 00:12:10.000 and what Is on the Weekends, but hers had a 143 00:12:10.040 --> 00:12:20.760 modern synthesizer sound to them. But then she would switch 144 00:12:20.800 --> 00:12:24.160 it up and sing these traditional Mexican mariachi songs that 145 00:12:24.280 --> 00:12:38.040 my parents loved and mac and then bam, she'd sing 146 00:12:38.080 --> 00:12:40.520 a song in English that sounded like something I would 147 00:12:40.520 --> 00:12:45.160 hear on my top forty station with R and B influences. 148 00:12:44.920 --> 00:12:46.040 Eurois on them. 149 00:13:00.280 --> 00:13:04.200 She was this force on stage and off stage. She 150 00:13:04.320 --> 00:13:08.160 was always joking and being silly. She never seemed to 151 00:13:08.200 --> 00:13:12.319 take herself too seriously. I remember someone asking her what 152 00:13:12.360 --> 00:13:14.480 she'd do if she wasn't a famous singer, and she 153 00:13:14.679 --> 00:13:17.720 was like, I don't know, work at a fast food joint. 154 00:13:18.040 --> 00:13:20.520 Chippians stookas and Senorita. 155 00:13:22.640 --> 00:13:25.840 No Sam rahnd water Berg. 156 00:13:28.080 --> 00:13:31.200 To seven year old me in nineteen ninety three, it 157 00:13:31.240 --> 00:13:35.960 felt nothing short of revolutionary to see a Mexican American 158 00:13:36.040 --> 00:13:40.240 woman with working class roots take pride in who she 159 00:13:40.559 --> 00:13:46.280 was and have the world love her for it. When 160 00:13:46.280 --> 00:13:49.160 I discovered her, Selena was in her early twenties and 161 00:13:49.240 --> 00:13:53.560 already a total star. She'd been singing since she was nine, 162 00:13:53.880 --> 00:13:58.120 touring Texas cities. I remember seeing her on TV winning 163 00:13:58.120 --> 00:14:03.920 at the Tihano Music Awards. Who that is so call? 164 00:14:05.120 --> 00:14:07.480 I like to thank every one of you who had 165 00:14:07.520 --> 00:14:09.760 supported Selena Zina's for many, many years. It has been such 166 00:14:09.800 --> 00:14:11.559 a long time since we've been in the music business. 167 00:14:11.720 --> 00:14:15.640 I would see her in commercials on Texas TV stations. 168 00:14:15.720 --> 00:14:21.960 Can't be Wanted Again from Coca Cola Classic, It's that 169 00:14:22.200 --> 00:14:24.360 be that coming you away. 170 00:14:25.560 --> 00:14:28.440 I remember people constantly talking about how she would be 171 00:14:28.480 --> 00:14:32.680 a mainstream crossover star once she finished recording an English 172 00:14:32.680 --> 00:14:36.880 album she was working on. But honestly, this wasn't the 173 00:14:36.880 --> 00:14:41.480 most impressive thing to me. What completely blew my mind 174 00:14:42.280 --> 00:14:46.520 was that she had crossed over into Mexico, the Mexico 175 00:14:46.560 --> 00:14:49.800 where kids made fun of me for not speaking Spanish perfectly, 176 00:14:50.440 --> 00:14:53.200 for not being the type of Mexican that people thought 177 00:14:53.240 --> 00:14:56.720 I should be my home country, that sometimes felt like 178 00:14:56.720 --> 00:15:00.600 it was slipping away from me. But here was Selena, 179 00:15:01.200 --> 00:15:06.040 Queen of all porcas, and Mexico loved her. 180 00:15:08.800 --> 00:15:13.200 Selena Borgo and Dolana. 181 00:15:14.800 --> 00:15:17.960 When I would mess up my Spanish, I felt this 182 00:15:18.200 --> 00:15:22.480 pang of humiliation and panic. But Selena was messing up 183 00:15:22.480 --> 00:15:26.240 Spanish all the time, and she did it with joy. 184 00:15:26.880 --> 00:15:28.640 Well, likes saying that he. 185 00:15:33.560 --> 00:15:37.560 That is said rock When she sang her Spanish sounded 186 00:15:37.720 --> 00:15:40.920 just fine, but she didn't learn to speak it until 187 00:15:40.920 --> 00:15:45.440 she was an older teenager. Here was Selena saying stuff wrong, 188 00:15:45.680 --> 00:15:51.120 translating out loud, struggling for words in Spanish and sometimes English. 189 00:15:51.640 --> 00:15:52.120 Just like me. 190 00:15:52.720 --> 00:15:54.680 It's just like a cute name, like hi, Peffy, what 191 00:15:54.720 --> 00:15:54.960 do you do? 192 00:15:55.080 --> 00:16:05.400 Pupfi? You know, like a garino, like a Gomez, garm likeation. 193 00:16:02.520 --> 00:16:09.240 Like when you know you. Selena switched between Spanish and English, 194 00:16:09.560 --> 00:16:13.680 Mexican and American in the public eye, and there were 195 00:16:13.680 --> 00:16:17.280 no cruel jokes, no shame in her accent, just adoration. 196 00:16:18.240 --> 00:16:27.360 She'd declare herself a proud Mexican. To me, it was 197 00:16:27.400 --> 00:16:30.440 as if she told Mexico, I don't sound like you, 198 00:16:30.960 --> 00:16:44.720 but this heritage is mine to claim to. It's never 199 00:16:44.800 --> 00:16:47.000 too late to get close to your roots, She'd say. 200 00:16:47.600 --> 00:16:51.200 Her identity as a Mexican American wasn't some novel detail 201 00:16:51.320 --> 00:16:55.320 people would find out about her no. It was central 202 00:16:55.360 --> 00:16:58.280 to her presentation as an artist and as a person. 203 00:16:58.960 --> 00:17:05.200 She was ex blicitly Mexican American, and just the way 204 00:17:05.240 --> 00:17:08.959 she looked really made an impression on me. Growing up 205 00:17:08.960 --> 00:17:13.320 on Univision and Mexican programming, all I mostly saw on 206 00:17:13.400 --> 00:17:18.439 television were these Mexicans with fair skin and often with 207 00:17:18.520 --> 00:17:23.240 blonde hair and light colored eyes. I remember watching Selena 208 00:17:23.400 --> 00:17:27.000 on Mexican shows and thinking, she's looks more Mexican than 209 00:17:27.040 --> 00:17:31.000 the host, and most people in Mexico probably thought the 210 00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:44.399 same thing, too. Oo, dummy, shout out to you if 211 00:17:44.440 --> 00:17:48.440 you recognize this, that lenovela opened from your childhood. Selena 212 00:17:48.440 --> 00:17:52.840 made cameos as herself on this hugely popular Mexican show. 213 00:17:53.520 --> 00:17:58.720 Her halting Spanish, contrasting the heavily enunciated sound of mostly 214 00:17:58.800 --> 00:18:00.600 white Mexicans around found her. 215 00:18:01.560 --> 00:18:14.280 Was thatsnos o sibandi. 216 00:18:16.680 --> 00:18:20.680 She was just magnetic different, and by nineteen ninety four, 217 00:18:20.720 --> 00:18:23.800 when I was nine, it seemed like she was on 218 00:18:23.960 --> 00:18:25.040 top of the world. 219 00:18:25.680 --> 00:18:26.560 The Grammy goes to. 220 00:18:29.280 --> 00:18:30.600 Live Selena. 221 00:18:30.760 --> 00:18:31.080 Okay. 222 00:18:31.800 --> 00:18:35.439 Selena won a Grammy Award for Best Mexican American Album 223 00:18:35.600 --> 00:18:38.879 for a live record of her music. That night, she 224 00:18:38.920 --> 00:18:42.119 wore this beautiful white gown with her black hair and 225 00:18:42.160 --> 00:18:44.080 an elaborate updu i'ld. 226 00:18:44.000 --> 00:18:46.760 Like to thank my band Bozinos, my father Abraham, my 227 00:18:46.840 --> 00:18:49.960 brother who's the producer of my music, and also my sister. 228 00:18:50.480 --> 00:18:52.399 Thank you for all the support. And I also like 229 00:18:52.480 --> 00:18:54.320 to thank all the my Latin family. Thank you for 230 00:18:54.320 --> 00:18:54.879 having faith and me. 231 00:18:54.920 --> 00:18:55.320 I love you. 232 00:18:55.359 --> 00:18:55.679 Thank you. 233 00:18:56.920 --> 00:19:00.720 She was an international star, filling major state ages in 234 00:19:00.760 --> 00:19:05.040 Mexico and other parts of Latin America. After a performance 235 00:19:05.080 --> 00:19:07.439 in New York City, the New York Times Culture the 236 00:19:07.720 --> 00:19:12.040 undisputed queen of the fastest growing genre in the country. 237 00:19:12.800 --> 00:19:13.440 Well, it's like a. 238 00:19:13.400 --> 00:19:14.080 Dream con true. 239 00:19:14.240 --> 00:19:15.879 I mean, there's been a lot of hard work that 240 00:19:15.920 --> 00:19:19.000 we put into it, but you know what, when you 241 00:19:19.040 --> 00:19:20.400 get hard work, you get success. 242 00:19:20.480 --> 00:19:25.920 And I couldn't believe someone like me was making it 243 00:19:26.520 --> 00:19:29.640 one of ours, those of us in the middle who 244 00:19:29.680 --> 00:19:33.040 felt like we weren't enough enough. 245 00:19:32.840 --> 00:19:38.720 To be fully Mexican or fully American. But Selina was 246 00:19:38.880 --> 00:19:45.560 enough in both places, and that meant that maybe I 247 00:19:46.200 --> 00:19:55.439 could be enough. Coming up, we go to March thirty first, 248 00:19:55.800 --> 00:19:58.920 nineteen ninety five, star faded away. 249 00:19:58.920 --> 00:20:01.920 Today Tae Hano, the Queen Selena has been gunned down 250 00:20:02.000 --> 00:20:03.399 in Corpus Christie. 251 00:20:03.400 --> 00:20:07.520 The day that changed my life and the country forever. 252 00:20:54.400 --> 00:20:58.720 Hey, we're back. We've been listening to anything for Selena. 253 00:20:59.080 --> 00:21:04.400 It's a collaboration between wbu R and Futuro Studios, hosted 254 00:21:04.440 --> 00:21:08.280 by journalist Maria Garcia, and Maria is going to pick 255 00:21:08.320 --> 00:21:09.200 up the story now. 256 00:21:10.600 --> 00:21:13.119 I don't remember if I went to school on March 257 00:21:13.160 --> 00:21:17.359 thirty first, nineteen ninety five. The day feels like a 258 00:21:17.560 --> 00:21:21.359 patchwork of images etched in my memory. It's hard to 259 00:21:21.400 --> 00:21:24.879 remember the order of things. I just see these vignettes, 260 00:21:25.200 --> 00:21:28.959 these split second moments, and I remember this pit in 261 00:21:29.000 --> 00:21:31.600 my stomach again. 262 00:21:31.720 --> 00:21:34.760 Recapping our top story to Hanna Recording star and South 263 00:21:34.800 --> 00:21:38.800 Texans Selena Quitania was shot and killed in Corpus Christy today. 264 00:21:38.840 --> 00:21:39.840 The person who bar I was. 265 00:21:39.840 --> 00:21:42.800 At home in the trailer, seeing my mom glue to 266 00:21:42.840 --> 00:21:45.720 the TV. He's been twenty four in just two weeks, 267 00:21:46.000 --> 00:21:49.680 tears rolling down her rosy cheeks. I'd never seen her 268 00:21:49.720 --> 00:21:53.879 cry for someone who wasn't our family, and initially I 269 00:21:54.000 --> 00:21:58.760 felt frozen. Star faded away Today Tejano music queen Selena 270 00:21:58.800 --> 00:22:00.840 has been gunned down in Corpus. 271 00:22:00.480 --> 00:22:01.600 CHRISTI we'll take. 272 00:22:01.600 --> 00:22:04.800 Family members in Mexico and the States called us crying 273 00:22:04.960 --> 00:22:08.000 in shock, asking if we were watching the news on TV. 274 00:22:08.440 --> 00:22:11.680 Corpus Christy police converged on this motel around eleven thirty 275 00:22:11.760 --> 00:22:15.119 this morning and quickly surrounded a red pickup truck inside 276 00:22:15.160 --> 00:22:17.879 the woman suspected of shooting to death to Hano music 277 00:22:17.880 --> 00:22:19.640 star Selena Kiritania Perez. 278 00:22:20.960 --> 00:22:24.680 Details poured in Selena had been shot by the president 279 00:22:24.760 --> 00:22:29.600 of her fan club. Her name was Yolanda Saldivar. I 280 00:22:29.640 --> 00:22:32.800 remember seeing her face on the news and feeling my 281 00:22:32.960 --> 00:22:35.919 body fill up with a novel kind of rage. 282 00:22:36.840 --> 00:22:39.119 The suspect in the shooting has been holding police at 283 00:22:39.119 --> 00:22:40.720 bay for hours, sitting in. 284 00:22:40.640 --> 00:22:42.760 A pickup truck in the parking lot and holding a 285 00:22:42.800 --> 00:22:43.600 gun to her head. 286 00:22:44.760 --> 00:22:47.199 When my dad came home from work that Friday, we 287 00:22:47.240 --> 00:22:52.439 watched the TV together. It got dark. I wept, my 288 00:22:52.560 --> 00:22:53.240 mom held me. 289 00:22:53.840 --> 00:22:58.440 The standoffs ended after ten hours of very intense negotiations. 290 00:22:58.760 --> 00:23:01.240 The suspect, lands Salivar. 291 00:23:00.920 --> 00:23:02.000 Came out of the truck. 292 00:23:02.400 --> 00:23:04.480 The police officers. 293 00:23:04.080 --> 00:23:07.520 Mused, I just broke out in tears and I couldn't 294 00:23:07.520 --> 00:23:09.000 believe it, and I still can't believe it. 295 00:23:09.440 --> 00:23:10.280 I'm still in chalk. 296 00:23:11.640 --> 00:23:15.480 Suddenly, girls like me and people like my family were 297 00:23:15.640 --> 00:23:20.360 everywhere on TV, crying for her, on the street, hearing 298 00:23:20.400 --> 00:23:21.639 ourselves on the news. 299 00:23:22.080 --> 00:23:24.680 Fans who did not know her felt as if they did, 300 00:23:25.080 --> 00:23:28.200 and their pain reflected the loss of a good friend. 301 00:23:28.880 --> 00:23:30.280 And you know, it just hurts. 302 00:23:31.200 --> 00:23:32.160 She's a good person. 303 00:23:40.520 --> 00:23:42.679 People said. The scale of the morning felt like the 304 00:23:42.760 --> 00:23:47.960 Kennedy assassination, and to me it felt seismic. We didn't 305 00:23:48.000 --> 00:23:52.280 care if others understood our grief. We understood it. We 306 00:23:52.440 --> 00:23:53.719 knew Selena mattered. 307 00:23:54.359 --> 00:23:57.480 Selena wanted to become a household name, and earlier this 308 00:23:57.600 --> 00:24:00.760 year in a most tragic incident, and got her wish. 309 00:24:01.320 --> 00:24:02.000 Selena. 310 00:24:02.200 --> 00:24:05.280 We played her music loud, We cried for her loud. 311 00:24:05.800 --> 00:24:11.959 We were finally fully ourselves out loud. I couldn't articulate 312 00:24:12.040 --> 00:24:16.520 this at that time. I hadn't intellectualized it, but I 313 00:24:16.600 --> 00:24:21.320 felt it. This shift inside of me, an urgency to 314 00:24:21.400 --> 00:24:25.520 stop hiding, to stop succumbing to shame, to stop dividing 315 00:24:25.560 --> 00:24:30.760 myself into Selena was proud of her heritage. She didn't 316 00:24:30.800 --> 00:24:36.080 hide who she was. How could I. Since Selena has 317 00:24:36.119 --> 00:24:40.280 stayed with me, she's been this constant, almost mythic like 318 00:24:40.400 --> 00:24:44.919 source of inspiration and resilience in my own life. I 319 00:24:44.960 --> 00:24:47.760 played her music after many hard days as a reporter 320 00:24:48.040 --> 00:24:51.280 along the border in my twenties. I wore a T 321 00:24:51.400 --> 00:24:53.399 shirt with her face on it when I needed some 322 00:24:53.560 --> 00:24:57.480 confidence At the fancy East Coast graduate school I went to, 323 00:24:58.600 --> 00:25:00.920 I watched her old concert. If I feel out of 324 00:25:01.000 --> 00:25:04.760 place in Boston, where I'm based, out of now. My 325 00:25:05.000 --> 00:25:08.800 love for Selena has informed even my current line of 326 00:25:08.840 --> 00:25:12.879 work as an arts and culture editor and critic, because 327 00:25:12.880 --> 00:25:16.360 I first experienced the power of art and music and 328 00:25:16.440 --> 00:25:23.240 symbolism through her. Selena is this way home, this path 329 00:25:23.320 --> 00:25:29.639 to my roots, this cornerstone that I come back to 330 00:25:29.680 --> 00:25:32.800 when I need to feel grounded, when I need to 331 00:25:32.880 --> 00:25:44.040 remember who I am. A quarter century later, Selena's everywhere. 332 00:25:44.760 --> 00:25:49.720 Her iconography is ubiquitous. She's on candles and T shirts 333 00:25:49.760 --> 00:25:54.040 and murals. Kim Kardashian dressed up as Selena for Halloween. 334 00:25:54.800 --> 00:25:58.439 Beyonce credit Selena as an early example of stardom that 335 00:25:58.520 --> 00:26:02.639 inspired her. There's a ton of social media accounts dedicated 336 00:26:02.680 --> 00:26:06.439 to finding rare archive videos of her and making memes 337 00:26:06.480 --> 00:26:11.040 about her. Her clothing is at the Smithsonian. She's also 338 00:26:11.119 --> 00:26:16.040 become a loaded symbol, sometimes used for political or social causes. 339 00:26:16.840 --> 00:26:21.240 She means so many things to so many people. 340 00:26:23.080 --> 00:26:25.840 Selenagilastinas was the soundtrack of our lives. 341 00:26:25.880 --> 00:26:28.080 Selena was the first form of representation for me is 342 00:26:28.080 --> 00:26:28.560 a Chicana. 343 00:26:28.720 --> 00:26:31.159 There was a lot of pride that people took in 344 00:26:31.440 --> 00:26:32.800 Selena and in her music. 345 00:26:32.840 --> 00:26:36.200 Whether you're p Riqua, or you're from Defa, or you're from. 346 00:26:36.080 --> 00:26:39.919 The United States, her music permeates everywhere. 347 00:26:40.080 --> 00:26:42.840 She was an icon that represented Pope. 348 00:26:42.960 --> 00:26:46.520 Like you know, we can all do it because Selena did. 349 00:26:46.400 --> 00:26:49.040 And we can pull something from her experience, from her 350 00:26:49.080 --> 00:26:50.600 life story, from her music. 351 00:26:56.920 --> 00:27:01.440 This podcast it's not really about Selena's story. I mean, 352 00:27:01.920 --> 00:27:06.440 yes it is, but really I'm trying to understand why 353 00:27:06.480 --> 00:27:10.080 her impact feels as far reaching today as it did 354 00:27:10.119 --> 00:27:13.439 a quarter of a century ago. I want to know 355 00:27:13.680 --> 00:27:21.399 what morning remembering celebrating Selena means. And after many, many 356 00:27:21.480 --> 00:27:25.560 months of immersing myself and her, I've come to realize 357 00:27:25.600 --> 00:27:29.720 Selena is like this vessel to understand so many things 358 00:27:29.760 --> 00:27:35.439 about race, class, body politics, and finding our place in 359 00:27:35.480 --> 00:27:53.600 this country. I wrote this podcast in El Paso because 360 00:27:54.040 --> 00:27:58.200 this border made me exist in an in between, an 361 00:27:58.200 --> 00:28:01.159 in between that drew me to Selena in the first place. 362 00:28:01.960 --> 00:28:05.760 I spent months in quarantine thinking about Selena and me 363 00:28:06.440 --> 00:28:13.200 here often after the rain. I don't know where this 364 00:28:13.320 --> 00:28:20.720 journey will take me, where I'll land, but I know 365 00:28:20.960 --> 00:28:25.479 where I start, and I start here. I start at 366 00:28:25.520 --> 00:28:28.439 the border. I start at the place that made me. 367 00:28:30.640 --> 00:28:34.760 I start from looking at the world as a front risa. 368 00:28:37.359 --> 00:28:42.640 I'm Maria Garcia and this is Anything for Selena, a 369 00:28:42.680 --> 00:28:58.040 podcast about belonging from wbu R and Futudo Studios. I 370 00:28:58.120 --> 00:29:01.360 have to be honest with you. I was scared at 371 00:29:01.360 --> 00:29:04.520 the beginning of this journey. When I got the green 372 00:29:04.600 --> 00:29:08.240 light for this project, it was under one condition that 373 00:29:08.320 --> 00:29:12.120 I secure something from Selena's family, not just an interview, 374 00:29:12.520 --> 00:29:16.560 but something else that at that time seemed kind of 375 00:29:16.640 --> 00:29:22.080 impossible to get. And I knew that to really understand Selena, 376 00:29:22.720 --> 00:29:26.200 not as this big icon, but as a real person, 377 00:29:27.280 --> 00:29:31.440 I had to go to her father. As a Selena 378 00:29:31.480 --> 00:29:36.760 fan all my life, I had complicated feelings about her dad. 379 00:29:37.760 --> 00:29:42.360 I'd seen him in the Selena movie portrayed as a controlling, shouting, 380 00:29:42.760 --> 00:29:43.600 possessive father. 381 00:29:44.320 --> 00:29:48.480 You listen to me, you all listen to me. If 382 00:29:48.480 --> 00:29:51.200 you follow that man, I will just stand the group. 383 00:29:51.400 --> 00:29:54.440 There will be no more Selena ILOs Dinos. Do you 384 00:29:54.560 --> 00:29:59.920 understand me? Do you all understand me? It's over. 385 00:30:00.960 --> 00:30:04.120 So if I wanted to make this podcast, I had 386 00:30:04.120 --> 00:30:08.840 to go to Abraham Quintania, notoriously known for guarding Selena's 387 00:30:08.920 --> 00:30:13.600 legacy with an iron fist, and ask him for something big. 388 00:30:14.560 --> 00:30:17.040 Oh man, mister, I've been dreaming of this moment for 389 00:30:17.080 --> 00:30:18.040 a very long time. 390 00:30:19.240 --> 00:30:20.040 We're happening here. 391 00:30:19.960 --> 00:30:33.360 Here, that's next time on Anything for Selena. 392 00:30:42.800 --> 00:30:46.040 Anything for Selena is a co production of w BR 393 00:30:46.280 --> 00:30:51.960 and Futuro Studios. The production team includes Kristin Torris, Antonia Serrihidro, 394 00:30:52.280 --> 00:30:56.120 and Juan Diego Ramirez. The executive editors are Marlon Bishop 395 00:30:56.400 --> 00:31:01.160 and Ben Rock Johnson. The Latino USA team includes Biel Macis, 396 00:31:01.480 --> 00:31:08.680 Andrea Lopez, Cruzsado, Julieta Martinelli, Alisa Escarce, Gini Montalgo, Alejandra Salasar, Rinaldo, 397 00:31:08.800 --> 00:31:12.560 Leangnos Junior and Julia Rocha, with help from Marta Martinez 398 00:31:12.600 --> 00:31:16.680 and praul Perees. Our engineers are Stephanie Lebau, Julia Caruso 399 00:31:16.800 --> 00:31:19.800 and Lia Shan, with help from Elisha ba Itto. Our 400 00:31:19.840 --> 00:31:23.160 digital editor is Rese Luna. Our theme music was composed 401 00:31:23.160 --> 00:31:25.600