Logo for Proxy with Yowei Shaw

Proxy with Yowei Shaw

Yowei Shaw

It’s the knot you can’t untangle — a problem so specific, it makes you feel alone. But what if you could talk to someone who gets it? On Proxy, we investigate niche emotional conundrums by finding someone who's lived something close enough — and following the conversation that unfolds. It’s not therapy. It’s emotional investigative journalism™️. Hosted by Yowei Shaw, former co-host and producer of Invisibilia.

Proxy is back with new cases every other Tuesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss the next one.

Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishaw

Get in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

If you’re new, try: Bisexual Wife Guy, Yowei Can't Speak Bro, or Nicole Can't Stop Being Aggro.

839140

It’s the knot you can’t untangle — a problem so specific, it makes you feel alone. But what if you could talk to someone who gets it? On Proxy, we investigate niche emotional conundrums by finding someone who's lived something close enough — and following the conversation that unfolds. It’s not therapy. It’s emotional investigative journalism™️. Hosted by Yowei Shaw, former co-host and producer of Invisibilia.

Proxy is back with new cases every other Tuesday. Follow the show so you don’t miss the next one.

Follow us on Instagram: @proxypodcast @yoweishaw

Get in touch at proxythepod@gmail.com

If you’re new, try: Bisexual Wife Guy, Yowei Can't Speak Bro, or Nicole Can't Stop Being Aggro.

839140
24hr 6min
Thumbnail for "The First Ever Extrovert-Introvert Cage Match".
Thumbnail for "Alex's Husband Is Too Straight".
Thumbnail for "Yowei Can't Speak Bro".
Thumbnail for "Jane Doesn't Like Her Dogs".
Thumbnail for "Caitlin Lost the Voice In Her Head".
Thumbnail for "Yowei Used to Hide Her Husband Kyle (from Love Letters)".
Thumbnail for "Nicole Can't Stop Being Aggro".
Thumbnail for "Bob and the Forgiveness Spell".
Thumbnail for "Yaroslava Can't Go Home".
Thumbnail for "An Estrangement Mystery".
Thumbnail for "JC's Kids Won't Talk To Her".
Thumbnail for "Alex and the Impossible Ask".
Thumbnail for "Sandy and the Silence".
Thumbnail for "How to Cope with Now".
Thumbnail for "Zakiya Used to Be So Fun".
Thumbnail for "Amanda and the Nonstop Narrator".
Thumbnail for "Brian Can't Stop Fact-checking His Mother-In-Law".
Thumbnail for "Is It Time To Break Up the Band?".
Thumbnail for "Aparna and the Self-Loathing Introvert".
Thumbnail for "Mic Chooses the Wrong Life".
Thumbnail for "Bisexual Wife Guy".
Thumbnail for "The Utility of Self-Delusion (and Big Show Update)".
Thumbnail for "The Group That Gets It".
The story of someone who suffered alone in secret for 8 years with a problem he was too afraid to Google -  and then he stumbled into a support group. In this episode, we dive into the emotional dynamics of support groups with Jason Yu. Why did...
Thumbnail for "Is there anything we can actually do about polarization?".
Whoever wins the election, Americans will still want to rip each other's heads off. Social psychologist Jay Van Bavel helps us understand why we should care about polarization, how we got here, and what, if anything, we can do about it.   ...
Thumbnail for "So many tears but what do they say?".
We all know that moment - when you feel like you need to cry in front of other people, but don't want to cry. In this episode, Yowei talks to Heather Christle, the author of , to parse what’s happening in that moment, what tears are saying and how...
Thumbnail for "Did we make our goal???".
Finally, a campaign reveal. Did we get additional funding to hire Kim for more hours? Plus, some updates for what’s in store for Proxy.    Episode credits: Produced by  and Kim Nederveen Pieterse Mixed by    Proxy is...
Thumbnail for "The Mechanics and Magic of Ritual".
The final installment of Yowei's quest to solve the mystery of proxy converations.    In this episode, Yowei talks to a ritual expert and tries explaining what she's learned about proxy conversations to her mom.    From the...
Thumbnail for "Psychodrama: The 2nd Oldest Psychotherapy You've Never Heard Of, But Have Definitely Tried".
Part 3 of Yowei's extremely meta quest to solve the mystery of proxy conversations.    In this episode, Yowei learns about psychodrama, a psychotherapy that has similarities to proxy conversations and used to be a dominant modality in the...
Thumbnail for "Connor Ratliff's Dead Eyes".
Part 2 of Yowei's quest to solve the mystery of proxy conversations. Why do they work?  How? Can Yowei figure out how to explain the show to people who don't get it?   In this episode, Yowei gets advice from actor, comedian, and proxy...
Thumbnail for "Survivor, Meet Proxy Offender".
Yowei has a problem. She's having trouble explaining the show to people who don't get it. She knows proxy conversations work. But why? How?   Part 1 of a 4-part quest to solve the mystery of proxy conversations. Yowei learns about a proxy...
Thumbnail for "The Layoff Trilogy 3: HR by Proxy".
With every layoff, there's the blackbox of what's really going on behind the scenes. Why did it go down the way it did? Was it really not about your performance, like they told you? How does the layoff list get made anyway?   In our inaugural...
Thumbnail for "The Layoff Trilogy 2: Danger Day".
Please note: This story contains brief mention of suicidal ideation. If you or someone you know may be considering suicide, contact the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by dialing 9-8-8, or the Crisis Text Line by texting HOME to 741741.  ...
Thumbnail for "The Layoff Trilogy 1: Layoff Girl".
The Layoff Trilogy 1: Layoff Girl
Thumbnail for "Welcome to Proxy".

The First Ever Extrovert-Introvert Cage Match

Thumbnail for "The First Ever Extrovert-Introvert Cage Match".
October 7, 202544min 26sec

The case of the introverts and extroverts who love each other, but sometimes can't stand each other. 

Why do some friends need constant contact, while others need three to five business days to text back? Why does one person’s “fun hang” feel like torture to another? And why does it hurt so much when the people we love have different ideas of what connection should look like?

In this special Proxy conversation, Yowei brings together comedian Aparna Nancherla, extrovert Ryan Letts, and introvert-extrovert expert Jennifer Kahnweiler for a historic summit on introvert-extrovert relations. Together, they investigate the tiny social mismatches that can make friendship feel impossible: who reaches out, who disappears, who makes too much eye contact, who doesn't make enough, and why we all secretly suspect we're too much, or not enough.  

From the episode: 

Aparna Nancherlawrote Unreliable Narratorand is on Instagram @aparnapkin: www.aparnacomedy.com

— Ryan Letts — runs Pando Integration Coaching

— Jennifer Kahnweiler — hosts Introvert Ally and wrote The Genius of Opposites:www.jenniferkahnweiler.com

New to Proxy? Try Bisexual Wife Guy for a classic case, or Yowei Can't Speak Bro, for another story about friends having trouble connecting. 

For episode liner notes, show gossip, and dispatches from the emotions beat, get our free newsletter File Under Feelings at proxyhq.org.

Proxy is an independent show, supported mostly by listeners. Paid members get bonus episodes, ad-free listening, live Proxy hangs, and the satisfaction of keeping emotional investigative journalism alive 🍏

Follow us on Instagram — @proxypodcast @yoweishaw

Visit — proxypodcast.com

Get in touch — proxythepod@gmail.com

Thumbnail for "The First Ever Extrovert-Introvert Cage Match".
The First Ever Extrovert-Introvert Cage Match
00:00
44:26